Youth Emotional Health

Raising Emotionally Strong Kids in a Checked-Out Generation

It’s a tough time to be a kid. And an even tougher time to be a parent, teacher, or mentor trying to guide them.

More and more, I see young people—children, teens, and adolescents—emotionally checked out before they even have a chance to fully step into who they are. Their heads are down, eyes locked onto screens, scrolling through an endless flood of information, comparison, and distraction. Anxiety, depression, and isolation are hitting our youth at record-breaking levels, and if we’re not careful, we’re going to lose them before they ever have a real chance to live.

The Mental Health Crisis Among Our Youth

Let’s look at the numbers. The CDC reports that 42% of high school students in the U.S. have experienced persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness—a 40% increase from a decade ago. Suicide rates among youth aged 10-24 have increased by nearly 60% over the past 15 years. One in five adolescents today has been diagnosed with a mental health disorder, and yet, most suffer in silence because they don’t have the tools or the support to navigate what they’re feeling.

A recent study from Harvard University revealed that social media use is directly linked to increased levels of anxiety and depression among teens, with excessive screen time affecting cognitive development and sleep patterns. Researchers at Yale University found that prolonged social media exposure rewires the brain’s reward system, making real-life interactions feel less satisfying, which can contribute to increased feelings of loneliness and disconnection.

Why Are Kids Struggling More Than Ever?

We could say it’s social media, we could say it’s the pandemic, or we could say it’s the breakdown of community and family structures. The truth? It’s all of the above—and then some. Our kids are facing:

• Overstimulation & Shortened Attention Spans: Platforms like TikTok and YouTube Shorts condition young minds to seek instant gratification, making deep focus and real-world emotional processing more difficult. A Microsoft study found that the average human attention span has dropped to just 8 seconds—shorter than a goldfish’s.

• Social Media & Comparison Culture: Teens today don’t just deal with peer pressure in their schools—they deal with it on a global scale, 24/7. Constant exposure to filtered, curated lives makes them feel like they’re never enough.

• Lack of Face-to-Face Connection: Digital interactions have replaced real conversations. Kids and teens struggle with basic social skills because they aren’t used to expressing themselves outside of a text or a DM.

• Trauma & Family Instability: Divorce rates, financial stress, and increased exposure to violence (both online and in real life) contribute to emotional distress in young people.

• Pressure to Perform: Whether it’s school, sports, or social media, kids feel an overwhelming pressure to be “the best” at everything, leaving no room for failure, learning, or self-discovery.

  
  

A study from Princeton University highlights the correlation between digital device use and increased stress levels in young adults. Researchers found that excessive screen time contributes to higher levels of cortisol, the body's primary stress hormone, making it harder for children to regulate emotions effectively.

How Do We Step In?

We can’t just sit back and watch this happen. We have a responsibility—as parents, grandparents, teachers, mentors, and community leaders—to model and teach healthy emotional processing. If we want emotionally strong adults tomorrow, we have to raise emotionally intelligent kids today.

Here’s how:

1. Teach Emotional Literacy

Kids need to know what they’re feeling before they can handle it. Instead of dismissing emotions like anger, sadness, or frustration, help them label those feelings and express them in healthy ways.

A study from Columbia University found that children who receive emotional education early in life show greater resilience in adulthood and have lower instances of anxiety and depression.

2. Unplug & Reconnect

Create boundaries for screen time. Have tech-free family meals. Encourage outdoor play, in-person socializing, and activities that build real-life relationships. If we don’t teach kids to find joy in the real world, they will always escape to the digital one.

3. Model Healthy Coping Mechanisms

We can’t just tell kids how to handle stress—we have to show them. Talk openly about emotions, practice mindfulness, journal, exercise, and demonstrate how to handle frustration without shutting down.

4. Build a Strong Support System

A single teacher, coach, or mentor can make a world of difference. Communities need to step up and provide safe spaces where kids can talk about their struggles without fear of judgment or punishment.

5. Slow Down the Pace

Not everything has to be a race. Allow kids to be kids. Encourage hobbies, creativity, and free time where they aren’t pressured to perform or compete.

6. Address the Root Causes

Understanding why a child is struggling is just as important as treating the symptoms. Are they facing peer pressure? Academic stress? Family trauma? Knowing what’s underneath the surface allows us to provide meaningful support.

7. Get Professional Help When Needed

There’s no shame in therapy or counseling. If a child is struggling beyond what a parent or mentor can handle, seeking professional guidance can be life-saving.

We are raising the next generation of leaders, innovators, and change-makers. But they won’t get there if they’re emotionally shut down before they even begin. We need to give them the tools, the guidance, and the emotional education that so many of us didn’t have growing up.

A joint study from Stanford University and MIT found that adolescents with strong emotional intelligence were more likely to succeed academically, socially, and professionally, highlighting the long-term impact of emotional health on overall life success.

The world isn’t getting any easier. But if we commit to raising emotionally strong kids today, we give them the power to navigate whatever comes next.

Let’s do this together.

Stay true and keep growing

Troy Rienstra